“Mr. Coach Klein, you got your manhood! You got your manhood.” – The Waterboy, 1998

After being emasculated and sent home a eunuch by a particular downstate tailwater, I was pitied by my home river and had a terrific day. I lost count, but took somewhere in the neighborhood of twelve to fifteen fish, with the best being a powerful, twenty-inch rainbow.

It’s a good thing too because as a man I’m especially fragile, and need constant reassurance from women and rivers alike.